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How To Define Sexual
Boundaries For Ministry

Listen to a three minute introduction to boundaries in ministry.

Sexual boundaries…especially related to teenage sexuality in Christian youth ministry…have not been defined. Ministry itself - until now - lacks a universal definition to which all ministries must conform if every ministry activity is to have a divine purpose.

This site is your resource for defining ministry carefully so that you do not undermine your ministry...your diocese...your religious congregation...or the people to whom you were sent.

It's simple to define an authentic ministry that has a Godly purpose...and religious effect...so you can tell it from dubious 'ministries' that have caused great scandal and great pain to the church and to the People of God.

After a Google search on "Christian ministry" brings back nearly five million pages with different examples of ministry...you might ask...

"How do you create a universal definition for the most overused undefined term in Christendom...ministry?"

There's no need to reinvent the wheel.

Aristotle's rule...gave the world a simple formula still used today for defining and differentiating things in science...law...philosophy and art.

Applying the rule to Ministry then...

Ministry is...

Religious Activity...

that brings both minister and people closer to God

There you have it!

In just eleven power packed words we have separated ministry from non-ministry activity. And separated religious activity that is ministry from religious activity that is not ministry (private devotions for example).

And so, we see that any authentic ministry activity has three indispensable qualities

  • ministry activity must be religious activity
  • ministry activity must be relational activity that involves both the minister and the people
  • ministry activity must bring both minister and people closer to God

But wait...

the clinical record shows that there are many ministers who believe "everything is ministry"...and sincerely pursue secular -- and even sinful -- activities as real ministries (Mt 7:21ff) with disastrous results. For example...

All are boundary violations...which come about because...ministers who think ministry activity is any activity they are involved in...leave out the first element of the definition...(religious activity)...and the third element...(closeness to God).

Typically...they only concentrate on the relational element and say...vaguely...that they are "ministering" to others.

And...

Boundaries are...

Behavioral rules... that set limits on what can and cannot be done... and what must be done... in different types of relationships

But...what do thousands of examples of ministry have in common that makes them all ministry and different from secular activity.

  • How is ministry to the poor different from secular social work?
  • How does clown ministry differ from clowning around?
  • What is youth ministry? The prevalence of teenage sexual abuse makes this a pressing question.

Boundaries cannot be determined unless you first have used the universal definition to decide that you are involved in an authentic religious ministry activity.

And that's why so many ministers have had billions of dollars worth of boundary violations.

So defining the rational foundation for the mystical activities of ministry is the first step a minister needs to take.

The second step is to decide on the boundaries...the prohibited and required behaviors in a defined ministry. For example...weekend prayer retreats for adolescents may be a ministry activity.

But having a private midnight retreat conference with the minister and adolescent sitting on the minister's bed is not ministry. Our universal definitions of ministry and boundaries sets separates ministry activity and non-ministry activity neatly.

Do you need proof? Put the definition of ministry to the test and within five minutes you'll see how much sharper your thinking about ministry is.

Sidebar: Here's a fast and effective way to jump start your ability to sort ministry from non-ministry

Look over your schedule for next week.

Then using the definition given here...

  • put the letter "M" next to each activity that is ministry as defined...
  • put "NM" next to a non-ministry activity. If you are in doubt err on the safe side...put "NM"...
  • put "R" next to activities that are religious but are not ministry as defined.

Begin to do this kind of coding immediately as you write items into your schedule. Within minutes...

  • your thinking about your work will be much clearer...
  • your ability to spot potential boundary violations in the ministry of others under your charge will be much sharper...
  • your satisfaction knowing you are truly doing God's work will be deeper...
  • Amen

Now you are on an exciting voyage in renewing and developing your ministry. When things are properly defined you almost always know the boundaries in any given situation...how to proceed...what to say...what not to do and say.

From here may want to visit the Covenants page because covenants specify the boundaries...the requirements and limitations...that keep minister and people close to God.

Much of your ministry work will be helping people to stay in or get back into their covenant with God.

Or you may have questions or comments. (We especially like comments about how we can do things better.) If so... contact us. But...before you go...

Subscribe to our newsletter The Boundary Hunter by clicking on the bookcover and get a FREE copy of



Boundaries Site Map For Ministry
Boundaries site map and table of contents for this ministry website

Privacy Policy of boundaries-for-effective-ministry.org
Privacy policy for people in ministry visiting boundaries-for-effective-ministry.org

Terms of use at boundaries-for-effective-ministry.org
Terms of use policy for boundaries-for-effective-ministry.org

Contact Information
Contact page

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Fuzzy logical thinking can ruin ministries morally and financially.

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The meaning of love in ministry.
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Core values operate unconsciously for better or worse in ministry.
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Christian Youth Ministry and Boundary Violations
Christian youth ministry has been a breeding ground for predators.

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Effective time management prevents ministry burnout.
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Develop a boundary inventory to valuate your ministry boundaries for relevance and effectiveness.

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The story of Noah is great drama...but the plot is a contract...a covenant...between God and humanity.

Father Abraham and his covenant with God was a religious contract.
Though Father Abraham was most beloved by God...he had to obey the conditions of a covenant to reap the benefits of God's esteem.

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